I’m talking searing pain, constant bleeding, and the pressing and dramatic urge to cry whenever I look at my boyfriends face. To put it simply, or as my dad would say, I’m having my monthlies.
To much information you’re thinking? Perhaps, but here’s where it gets serious. I literally want to do nothing but sit on the couch, eat the chip crumbs I’d spilled down my shirt, and break into tears every few minutes. Actually, let me rephrase that. I can’t do anything but the above things. And believe me, as someone who thrives on getting tasks done, I work ridiculously hard to push past everything and tackle my to do lists anyway.
Needless to say, it usually doesn’t go very well.
Now, regardless of periods or not, we all get sick. We get colds, throw up, feel miserable, and still try to trudge through work, school, jobs, or whatever obligations we think we have to do so that the world doesn’t end.
Listen up guys – and I’m talking to myself here too – you’re not that important.
I don’t mean that in a rude way, so don’t start getting all offended here. I mean it in the sweetest possible way, because once you get it, it takes down the stress in your life by a billion. Well, maybe not that much, but close enough.
The world won’t end because you need to take a sick day or two. Your coworkers won’t die, your job won’t explode, people won’t hate you (and if they do they shouldn’t be in your life in the first place), and tomorrow will always be waiting around the corner for things to get done. If I don’t study today, if I choose to read or play video games instead of trying to cook huge meals for myself, or if I put off replying to my messages for a little while longer, absolutely nothing is going to happen.
It’s like we all have these huge massively inflated senses of importance and duty, that we feel as though when we aren’t around, aren’t getting things done or being productive, the world’s going to end.
But you know what? Before you’re an employee, a wife, a husband, a child or a mom or a productive member of society – or whatever else you classify yourself as – you’re a human being. And human beings are delightful, extraordinary things that are often more delicate than we would like to admit, and we’re not robots. There’s this culture of trying to be more than what we are. We worship those who can handle their colds the best, who come to work despite their anxiety and recent breakups, and strive to be more like that. We think that the more resilient we are, the more we’re able to handle gracefully, better we are as people. But we’re not.
Human beauty is found in the messiness, in our weaknesses and our struggles, in our emotions and miseries and how we face those things head on. It’s not found in our ability to pretend everything’s fine until we eventually burn ourselves out and go crazy, and we have to stop thinking that our only value lies in our ability to suck things up.
Because here’s the things guys: you’re not valued because of what you do, how well you suck things up, or how resilient you think you are. You’re valuable because of who you are. Because you bring a light to the world that no one else can, and if you’re putting your work, school, relationships, or whatever else ahead of yourself, especially when you’re feeling like absolute trash, you’re not valuing yourself as a person, and you’re telling yourself, and the rest of the world, than you’re not as important as the rest of the things in your life.
Yes, I need to start my businesses, work on things with my boyfriend, and respond to all the texts I’ve been avoiding. But do I have do to that today, when I just want to sit and cry? No. Like I said, the world won’t end. Tomorrow is another day, and I’m important enough to myself to put down the work, and take care of my needs instead.
So next time you’re debating whether you should be strong enough to suck something up, maybe it’s time to take a step back and make sure you’re taken care of first. As I often say, you can’t take take care of anyone or anything else if you don’t have yourself covered.